It takes immense courage to speak about such a personal experience, and we’re incredibly grateful to Donna for trusting us with sharing her and Jac’s story.
Through shared experiences, we hope this will help other grieving individuals feel less alone, offering comfort and connection to those in a similar situation.
If you, or someone you know, is in need of support following the sudden death of a child or young person, please reach out to our dedicated support team by contacting [email protected] or calling 01443 853125
On Sunday the 12th of November 2023 my son, Jac, was tragically taken from me as a result of a road traffic collision.
Jac and I lived in West Wales, and as he grew older, it became clear that the opportunities for him to find a job and career were limited. We were in the process of looking for a new home near Bridgend, where there would be much more opportunities for him. Jac enjoyed working with cars and body work and a family member had been making enquiries at a local Audi Garage for him. We were both looking forward to a fresh start and we had everything to look forward to.
The day before the collision is a day I will cherish for the rest of my life. Jac and I spent a lovely day shopping. Jac spent his birthday gift vouchers early, something that I give him each year. We had a bite to eat and sat in the car by the seafront for a little while chatting and listening to some of Jac’s music he’d produced. Later, we spent time with Jac’s close family at their caravan playing games and watching a Christmas film. We made these lovely memories before Jac said that he might go to a music event later that evening.
Later that evening, I was watching television and Jac came in to say “goodbye” as he was going out to a music event. I was wary about him going as I’d heard there had been issues on the M4 motorway and I asked him not to go. Jac reassured me that everything would be fine, he gave me a kiss and said “goodbye”.
The following day I was at work when I was approached by a police officer and received the worst news a mother could ever hear. From this moment every element of my life changed, physically, socially, emotionally, financially and mentally. That day I not only lost my son, but I lost my best friend as well.
Soon after losing my darling Jac, I had to endure my first Mother’s Day and birthday, which followed each other, without him. I cannot find words to describe the overwhelming pain and despair I felt dealing with the reality that I would never again share any precious moments or milestones with my son.
Being part of a very large family and given that Jac and I have a very large circle of friends, Jac’s loss has broken so many hearts and will remain the same forever.
Before the collision, I was an independent and confident person. I always had a job, even when Jac was only 5 ½ months old. I worked in a small family-run clothes and gift shop and dealt with customers and members of the public on a daily basis. I enjoyed socialising with friends and family. I ran our home, organised day-to-day life, paid the bills and did everything I could to support our family. Now I have panic attacks and suffer from anxiety. My emotions overwhelm me, my chest feels tight, and it feels like I’m having a heart attack.
The thought of having to go out in public makes me anxious and panicked. I worry about seeing somebody I know who isn’t aware of what’s happened to Jac. I get embarrassed when I get upset and have to explain what happened. The thought of re-living this over again and again is too much. It has affected my normal day-to-day activities like going shopping and making appointments. It’s incredibly hard and sometimes impossible just to step outside the house.
I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and am now medicated. I hate the fact I must take tablets just to get through the day but unfortunately, it’s something I’ve sadly come to accept. I have also received complimentary reflexology treatment through the charity, 2wish, which has helped me greatly. My lifestyle has changed, and I now spend a lot of time at support groups speaking with other people who have had to deal with what I’m going through.
Jac’s death has left me asking myself what I have done to deserve all this hurt and pain. I’ve always tried to do the right thing and help people. I’ve always worked hard. I constantly think about the what-ifs and what could have been if things had been different.
Losing Jac has affected every part of my life and things will never be the same again. It has left me heartbroken and I miss him every day.
10 June 2025
2wish Head Office
Unit 3, Sovereign Court
Sterling Drive
Llantrisant
Rhondda-Cynon-Taff
CF72 8YX
